Let's do the time warp again...

Sorry. Last week I felt icky for a couple of days, and then I had my workshops/playing with A-man time. Went down to S & B’s Thursday night in order to be able to go straight to my workshop the next morning.

At the workshops I ended up being paired with some characters. The first day it was a very fit seventy year old man who was very funny and kept telling me how great I was. The second day it was a younger man (couldn’t tell what team he was on) who kept telling me I had Pantene hair. I was told I was good at what we were doing, so I hope it was true.

All weekend I was having vivid dreams. Several were obviously about self-confidence. A few of them had Jillo and Cgrace in them. I feel like I am in a time/space warp. Keep feeling very “high-school” and yet as though my past isn’t real, or isn’t mine. Very odd sensation. I also noticed the disconnect I sometimes feel when playing with A-man. I look at him, and this feeling of realness washes over me. He becomes VERY real instead of just a bundle of feelings in my brain. It was great fun playing with him. He is learning to say all kinds of things, and is VERY observant. He sometimes zones out and gets a “far away” look. Then he suddenly comes to life and has a questioning look on his face. Sometimes he’ll ask something or make a noise, and you realize he wants to know what it is he is hearing. I realize how many sounds I tune out (the oven popping as it heats up or the fridge vibrating), and how many are all new to him.

A big thing happened for the S & B house last week, and I am very proud of B and the guys. They have worked very hard, sacrificed a lot, and had to have immense confidence that all would work out. It is good to seem them rewarded for all of that.

My to-do list is undulating…short, long, short, long…as I remove and add things. You know sometimes I just freak out and have a magic wand moment and want to make it all happen at once. I am very immature. Hehehehehehehehehehehehehehehe

Just took a little walk around to get out of the cave. Chatted with one of the fellows who is a boxer. I continue to have a question float to the top of my thoughts. Why is it that I don’t seem to have a passion for something? Is there something out there that would be so enthralling that digging deeper would seem second nature, instead of a chore? I always recall a discussion on the subject, during which HogFrogBoy declared I was put on this earth to be a Mom. Mom is not a career that pays very well. Mom is not a career for which you can choose the start date. Mom greatness is a very subjective thing.